There is something so intriguing about the Spirit of the Living God.
He is always around but we seem to devise a false fact that He is only around at youth retreats, spiritual conferences and "good" worship nights. Why do we look past His signals and signs that shines brightly on our faces?
I do not understand Him. The Lord has called us to live in the Spirit... Therefore I must. I long to understand His ways but this earth screams at me and tells me that His ways are too this or too that! Even some forms of the Church... the house of the Lord... strives to keep His ways out! I do not wish to do so!
I want to read the Bible take it literally! I want to read what the Lord says and asks and then I want to be able to do... not to hold back to fulfill partially... but to DO!
As my heart and longing grows for knowledge of the Spirit also the struggle and battle of the enemy increases. As I search for the Spirit the enemy is strong at work to cause confusion and doubt within me. I am pressing through the evil one's ploys and schemes but they take a toll on my heart. There is only one cure and that is the Lord. He is my comfort and strength.
I constantly find the enemy deceiving my thoughts by the closure of my mouth. He knows that one of the most powerful ways to convey the Spirit and His power, along with action, is speech. He spits out lies upon lies that the things I have been experiencing with the Lord are unworthy of speech. That what the Holy Spirit is doing in my life is too minuscule for anyone to care. When I try to speak, fear grips my heart and my words are silent. I hate it. I hate that I have been conned into this lie. I hate that I cannot find my way out of it because I sometimes still believe it. Even as I write this the evil one is heavy on my shoulders and is whispering continual lies into my ears. Right now he is hammering the feeling of disappointment into my thoughts. He is telling me that I should feel disappointed in myself for not even going to the one person on earth I confide everything in. The one person that is most stoked about the Spirit's work right now and I have not even told her the work in me except for a few measly text messages. I know these lies to be wretched and deceitful and yet I hear them. Wow Satan sure knows your weaknesses and he goes right for the cheap shots.
These battles are strong... Father, fight for me. I call out to your immovable power!
I want the Spirit to destroy these fears and doubts. I know He can! I don't want to come down from that mountaintop! I want to live it and use it for The Holy and worthy Father's glory!
Holy Spirit create in me a dwelling place... fight for me,He is always around but we seem to devise a false fact that He is only around at youth retreats, spiritual conferences and "good" worship nights. Why do we look past His signals and signs that shines brightly on our faces?
I do not understand Him. The Lord has called us to live in the Spirit... Therefore I must. I long to understand His ways but this earth screams at me and tells me that His ways are too this or too that! Even some forms of the Church... the house of the Lord... strives to keep His ways out! I do not wish to do so!
I want to read the Bible take it literally! I want to read what the Lord says and asks and then I want to be able to do... not to hold back to fulfill partially... but to DO!
As my heart and longing grows for knowledge of the Spirit also the struggle and battle of the enemy increases. As I search for the Spirit the enemy is strong at work to cause confusion and doubt within me. I am pressing through the evil one's ploys and schemes but they take a toll on my heart. There is only one cure and that is the Lord. He is my comfort and strength.
I constantly find the enemy deceiving my thoughts by the closure of my mouth. He knows that one of the most powerful ways to convey the Spirit and His power, along with action, is speech. He spits out lies upon lies that the things I have been experiencing with the Lord are unworthy of speech. That what the Holy Spirit is doing in my life is too minuscule for anyone to care. When I try to speak, fear grips my heart and my words are silent. I hate it. I hate that I have been conned into this lie. I hate that I cannot find my way out of it because I sometimes still believe it. Even as I write this the evil one is heavy on my shoulders and is whispering continual lies into my ears. Right now he is hammering the feeling of disappointment into my thoughts. He is telling me that I should feel disappointed in myself for not even going to the one person on earth I confide everything in. The one person that is most stoked about the Spirit's work right now and I have not even told her the work in me except for a few measly text messages. I know these lies to be wretched and deceitful and yet I hear them. Wow Satan sure knows your weaknesses and he goes right for the cheap shots.
These battles are strong... Father, fight for me. I call out to your immovable power!
I want the Spirit to destroy these fears and doubts. I know He can! I don't want to come down from that mountaintop! I want to live it and use it for The Holy and worthy Father's glory!
Stephie
No comments:
Post a Comment