It happened overnight...

Wow, what a full schedule ahead of me! I mean i have church (youth group & cell group), school...of course, Tech work for church, Tech Work for Wakefield Theatre Company, Tech Work for NC Theatre @ Fletcher, Homework, ITS ( International Thespian Society), Sister Moving Out Day, Film Festival, Aunts coming, Wakefield Theatre Company's productions productions productions, and somewhere between the madness...having a life.

Loving every moment of it,

Steph

Only a moment.

Okay i only have a moment but let this moment be of rejoice of all the things God is blessing me with! School, TECH WORK! ( i cant thank Him enough), Theatre, film festivals, friendships, sister, classes, church ( wow i love my church), mentor, teachers, learning, a smile on my face, a schedule, a life, hugs, email, encouragement, love, laughter.., and so much more but should be studying right now so there.

Tee He he

Steph

What fond memories,

Have you ever heard a song on the radio or just randomly heard a song and it just reminded you of one particular moment of your life, i love those times

• Carry Away by Shane & Shane : Senior High Beach Retreat 08 12:00am Battleship Tournament ( "kirk")
  


• I Kissed a Girl by Katy Perry : Joke with Catherine cause she hates it! haha



• Girls Just wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper : Joke with Jess cause she doesn't like it.



• Lucky by Jason Mraz : Weekend w/ Jess



• Why Georgia by John Mayer : Senior High Beach Retreat 08; Jess was playing it on her guitar and that moment just stuck out to me for some reason



• Room For Squares by John Mayer : The road trip to the Beach Week 08



• Hearts of Servants by Shane & Shane : The Beach Weekend 08 Jess, Heather, Sam sang it out on the porch on a beautiful breezy beach day



• I Am by Nichole Nordeman: Will and Nancy's Wedding... first time i ever cried at a wedding



• Water From the Well by Acappella: Singing it with Whit, Dad, and Mr. Chauncey when i was 4 years old



• Deep Way Down Deep by UNKNOWN : Whit singing at the top of her lungs on the way to Atlanta



• Rely by Jessica Lyndon Ray Band: Ski Retreat 08 in the conference room the night we got there and after Dan speaking and worship time sitting with all the girls beside me and i in tears of Gods glory as we listened to Jess just play which turned out to be Rely.



• Light on a Hill by Margot and The Nuclear So and So's: The first conversation i had with Jess



• The Pee Song by Whitney Drummond: Camping with the family and whit had to go pee so she made up the pee song... haha



• He'll Take Care of The Rest by Keith Green: The road trip back from Ski Retreat 08



• You Put This Love In My Heart by Keith Green: My Childhood and introducing Jess to Keith Green in Charlotte on our way to the Hilton for some more fun.



• That song about the yo yo that we got stuck in our heads at Planet Wisdom



• Drops of Jupiter by Train: Road trip back from The Beach Weekend 08 5 girls singing at the top of their lungs and messing up lyrics!

• Blessed by Brett Dennen: The Hilton Channel, watching it with Whit and Jess in our room on that sweet huge tv

Okay now i have to go get some shleep,

Steph

Enough Said...

Outside, rain pouring roughly to the ground, playing songs on the guitar, singing with the brother, back of a van, night, eating homemade Oreo ice cream...fantasticalness.

with numb fingers i type,

Steph

Sheesh i love this feeling,

I am so happy! Like a happiness even i cant explain! I just want to smile all the time and spread my happiness and laugh and have a great time all day long. I want to make the best out of everything and not complain about anything. I am in my first week of school i am supposed to, directed by teen law, be completely depressed that i have to go back to school but it isn't like that for me this year. This year everything is a blessing and is so much fun. Why should i look at anything God has given me with disgust? That is a horrid offense that shouldn't be forgiven, but he is Christ Jesus our Lord and he forgives. Wow, i love being this happy, i love being this close to my Lord and Savior. You know i am huge on lists so here i go... all i want to do right now at this moment is; laugh, smile uncontrollably, hug real tight cause i can, love, scream "God is my Victory" and " All of my life in every season You are still God I have a reason to sing I have a reason to worship", and now i have to go to bed cause i am already 30 min past my bedtime...i don't think i will be able to fall asleep i am so happy.

my happiness provided by One,

Steph

And it is only the second day...

So wow, i love high school. Its uncontrollable, i just do. There is just something about it that fascinates me. Today i sat in 4th period Algebra II, about 20 mins until the bell would ring telling us it was time to leave, and i just thought as was trying to finish up my last few equations, i love doing this. I love learning, understanding, walking the halls, running up to the third floor from the first trying to get to class before my five mins are up, sitting at a desk, taking notes (i love notes by the way), listening to the teacher, waving to a friend as we walk past in the hall, responsibilities, being organized, assigned seats, laughing at lunch, raising my hand, campus, teachers, seeing someone i have never seen before every day, swivel seats, binders, homework, classwork, standing right outside of the school right before the first warning bell rings and looking at all the happenings that surrounds me, the sounds, walking on the black stage of the theatre, being back in the shop of the theatre, walking above everyone on the catwalk, things that are starting to fill my calender, planners, working after school on props for the upcoming play/musical/dance recital, hall passes, pink schedules, advisory, bells, lockers, combinations, forms, full backpacks, name cards, sitting in alphabetical order with Mr. Orsett's class, doing the wave in the middle of class, conversations with teachers, discussions, french names, Savage, daydreaming during class, acting out skits of Lab Safety, making stupid list like this in my head during school hours, getting a seat on the pink couch, seeing memories from last year, 1000 freshmen, roll call, pens, SCHOOL!

I am determined to have a fantastical year and nothing less!

Steph

Stupendous Night

What a lovely night.  You wanna know why there is a smile displayed on my face? I just got to hang out and laugh uncontrollably with a great group of people. Smiling, again, has to be one of my favorite things in the world. I love it. Tonight i couldn't smile enough. And I love seeing my friends smile cause i know they are happy and seeing the people i love happy is one of the best feelings in the world. I wish every moment of everyday was spent being as happy and carefree as it was tonight. I go back to school in a day and even though i have that on my mind tonight let me forget all about the things to do and the worries that school brings along.

Another rejoice tonight is that all this week i have been going to the Lord, i have been  trying to see what He wants of me this school year. I want to honor and glorify Him in everything i do in this new year but i need His help every step of the way. So this week was all about finding my place in that wonderful path He is leading me on. All week He lead me to new places in our relationship, it was so great. I feel like i am stepping into my 10th grade year fully prepared and ready to be bold for Him

Ending the night with  a Macbook on my lap, a guitar resting beside me, and music playing throughout the quiet room. 

Steph

Jess

Happy Birthday Jess! I just want to say i love her right now because i look up to her so much its unbelievable. cause whenever i talk to her i am happy and she makes everything bad i am feeling just float away. cause she is my teacher. cause she is my friend. cause she is SO cool. cause she is my mentor. cause she is the musician and i am the fan. cause she is my make believe sister. cause she giggles. cause she has the best hugs. cause she is one person i would be okay to shnuggle with (and there aren't that many). cause when we try to talk serious we end up laughing (mostly its my fault because i smile at her, hehe). cause i could mess up and she would forgive me. cause she has the best taste in music. cause she is my shepherd. cause she believes in me. cause she was one of the main people that brought my heart solely to the LORD(and she might not know that). cause she speaks for me. cause she is my sister's best friend. cause she is 5 years older than i. cause the sound of her singing makes me want to cry and smile at the same time. cause she has plans for her life. cause her passion for Christ is enormous. cause she makes mistakes. cause she gives me hope that dreams do come true. cause she has a picture of me in her car (That if it were up to me wouldn't be there). cause she trusts me. cause it amazes me that we have only known each other for about 2 years. cause she makes me laugh when i shouldn't. cause sometimes when i am around her i am an idiot but it is fun. cause when we talk she is completely serious and focused on me. cause she waited to tell me about Darlene Zschech when we were alone. cause she thinks i can really become whatever i want. cause she knows. cause if i break down and cry in her arms she would hold me and help me get to my feet again. cause when i told her she took it in stride. cause she can take my sarcastic nature. cause she is there for me. cause she is just herself and no one else.cause she is one of the most beautiful people i have ever met not only because she is pretty on the outside but the Spirit lives within her and shines out of that big (non-horse like)smile of hers. cause she has dreams. cause even though she is all of these to me i am still nervous to talk to her openly (I've never been good at it). cause when i was alone she sat with me. cause one of her smiles can make me smile for hours. cause when i did something as simple as wrap a cord she was intensely proud. cause she means so much to me.

Jess - if you do read this, on your 20th birthday i want you to know that you have had an amazingly big impact on my life and I am completely grateful for that, Thank you for being a part of my life.


And she might not even see this, which i am perfectly fine with. Actually if she does read this the probability of me avoiding her for a while is pretty high, just cause i get real embarrassed about this sort of thing.


Sincerely,
Stephanie

Time is ticking away

The summer is over. That statement just made me completely sad. To think back to the beginning of the summer, it really truly feels like a week ago. I remember the weekend before i got out of school thinking to myself how happy i was going to be when i was free from all the worries of school. That Sunday night before my last day of school, was so much fun and i just thought the entire night, if this is what summer is going to be like i am going to have an amazing summer. But you know, i think my Spring was better than my Summer. I remember just everyday feeling like i had a great day and i had stuff to look forward to and it was just fun. I think the Spring of 2008 will be one of the best times of my life.

So this weekend is my last weekend before school starts and my last weekend spending time with my sister in OUR house possibly forever. Next weekend she is out of town and then the weekend after that she is going to be moving out. There are so many things running through my mind right now; I'm scared, i want to talk to someone in particular, school=sooner than my mind can grasp, sadness, excited for tomorrow, excited for Saturday, excited for Sunday, dreading Monday, i want to cry in someones arms, i don't want to disappoint, i want to smile all weekend, i want to continue something for a long time, i want my friend's birthday to be perfect and for her to be extraordinarily happy, i want my plans for tomorrow to really happen, i am dreading 2 weeks from now exactly,i need conformation, i don't want this song to end, i cant wait until Sunday night to be here, i don't want to be nervous when i go up to someone on Sunday, i want to please (but i shouldn't), i want God to flatten me right now cause i need Him, i want God to shine through me everyday at that massive school of mine, i want to be someone the jh girls can look up too (am i?), i dont want people to ask where i got my clothes i want them to ask why i am different, i want thank God for putting some people in my life,

im wondering why i want to be anything but God's servant.

Steph

Laughter and A little message

Laughter is amazing! I just had one of the best laughs in a long time! I was in pain i was laughing so hard. I think we were just in a giggly mood tonight and me being thrown off the bed didn't help much. That's all i really had to say is that i love laughing and i am so glad God gave us such a simple thing a laughter.

P.S.

Catherine - I promise you that i am not going to get into any relationship with any boy anytime soon, so you don't have anything to worry about. The heart is a fragile thing and i don't want mine to get injured. If there is one thing i know it is to be careful and that is what i am doing. I made a decision a while ago and i intend to keep to that. And good gracious i feel more for the guy that i do decide to date in the future, cause he will have a ton of people to deal with, and one of them being you.

with my heart only belonging to the One,

Steph