Ears Open

Like a little girl i sat on my church pew swinging my legs, listening to a girl speak of things my mind has only kinda of grasped. Every time this girl has spoken something has tugged at my heart and i cant seem to get her words out of my thoughts for weeks, months...wait i still havent gotten her words out of this head of mine.

Im a slightly girly-girl. I dont have a problem admitting to it. I dont like camping, i dont go on the annual youth backpacking trip, i would rather watch a movie than go on a walk...But. If God asked me to go, to go to a country with nothing but a river to wash in and a shack to live in...I would go. I am at a point in my life where I want nothing but to proclaim His name. I have been verbally beaten because of His name over and over again. I have been treated horrid because i shine. But I still run hard after Him. I want the world to know Him, i want them to hear His name. And if that takes me going to some far off distance place in this world...i will go. I want to be that girl at those gates that are taller than the farthest point she can see and thick enough that she cant knock on, but still she screams His name. I would go even if that meant leaving my family, my sister, my mentor, my friends, my dog, my home. And oh gosh would i miss them but if He calls, i leave and follow.

And oh how i wish i was staying here at my house tonight because i want to speak of this to her. She is going to be here tonight and I will not and do wish to talk to her about this. I wanted to run up to her this morning and grab her and hug her and tell her all of this, but i didnt. I guess it will have to wait.

Listening for His call,
Stephie